THE PACK DIARIES: TSA TANGO AT TERMINAL 2

the pack diaries: tsa tango at terminal 2

 i was flying one way to scoop packs, then driving back. real light just a backpack and a small duffel. the duffel?

a trap starter kit:

– a full-size

 vacuum sealer

– vac seal rolls

 – scissors

– wrap paper

 – tape

 – a fat can of febreze and nothing else already stoned. tsa feels louder when you’re paranoid. an older agent flags my bag.

my heart slams. she starts pulling things out like she’s doing a tutorial:

first the vacuum sealer—big, clunky, loud as hell.

then scissors, vacuum seal paper, tape,

then… the febreze.

she looks at me. i swear she’s doing math in her head: “vacuum sealer… bags… masking odors?” 

then she goes: “this spray’s too big. you can’t bring this.”

me, tryna stay chill: “oh totally, yeah—please throw it out. my bad!”

she tosses the febreze, repacks the rest, and waves me through.

i’m walking to the gate like: “no way she didn’t know.” but maybe… she really didn’t.

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